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This paper examines the approaches heterosexual men and women in South Africa use to engage their partners in discussions of HIV and risk factors in their relationships. These strategies entail balancing the risks of infection while managing the challenges of maintaining a relationship. In a context in which there is a great deal of insecurity in relationships it is especially challenging to discuss HIV risks with partners.

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Mabeo is a member of Positive Connection, the only Internet dating forum geared to people with HIV in South Africa, the country with more infections – over 5 million and counting – than any other. I still haven’t found anyone I’ve gotten romantically involved with, but I’m carefully going through the list.

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Dating can be tricky for anyone, but if you are living with HIV, there are some extra things to think about. Two important things to consider are:. If you are looking for a positive partner, consider going to places online and in person where you will meet other people living with HIV. These include HIV-focused support groups, conferences, or dating websites such as www. For many women living with HIV, the big issue is disclosure. How and when do you tell? There is no one easy or perfect way to tell someone you are living with HIV.

Often, it is not how or when you tell, but whom you tell. Similarly, if a person is going to accept you and your diagnosis, timing of disclosure may not matter as long as you tell before having sex. You may wish to wait to disclose your status until after a sexual encounter for fear of rejection or embarrassment. There are several reasons why it may be safer for you NOT to do this:. Some women living with HIV find it hard to think about dating because they feel less desirable or less appealing than HIV-negative women.

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Instead, relationship characteristics and gender differences had a greater influence on relationship survival after diagnosis. Prevention policies encourage partner disclosure in order to increase testing. However, research has pointed to gender differences for migrants from sub-Saharan Africa, with women possibly being more reluctant to disclose due to fears of rejection, violence and discrimination.

However, some studies indicate that women often find emotional and material support as opposed to rejection upon disclosure. In certain instances disclosure was not significantly linked to relationship break-up; instead the nature of the relationship may be more relevant. Living conditions, poverty and unemployment may also play a role. Most migrants to France experience varied hardships shortly after migration, the period in which migrants are most likely to acquire HIV and receive their diagnosis.

Many people find this term stigmatising as it suggests information which is normally kept secret. Studies aim to give information that will be applicable to a large group of people e. Because it is impractical to conduct a study with such a large group, only a sub-group a sample takes part in a study.

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